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Writer's pictureJessica Adams

Gaslighting sounds like…

Updated: Apr 14, 2022

“Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which a person or a group covertly sows seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or group, making them question their own memory, perception, or judgment. It may evoke changes in them such as cognitive dissonance or low self-esteem, rendering the victim additionally dependent on the gaslighter for emotional support and validation. Using denial, misdirection, contradiction and misinformation, gaslighting involves attempts to destabilize the victim and delegitimize the victim's beliefs.”


Gaslighting is usually within a dynamic of a relationship, whether that relationship be romantic or platonic. Gaslighting can occur with a public figure (just look at Donald Trump), or in the workplace, or in a friendship as well as with a member of your family or someone who is a romantic partner. It can start off fairly insignificant, however the seriousness can spiral. This is because any situation where you are left questioning your own judgement or reality due to the deliberate intent of someone else may lead to self-doubt, and a disconnect to your own intuition. This could then establish a cycle in which you feel unable to negotiate your own perspective in daily life in a way that feels clear, focused and with confidence of making sound decisions.


Some examples of gaslighting comments:


  1. “You need help”

  2. “You’re so emotional”

  3. “Why are you so defensive all the time”

  4. “I wouldn’t have done that to you”

  5. “You’re always twisting things”

  6. “You’re imagining things”

  7. “That’s a false accusation”

  8. “Don’t get upset over nothing”

  9. “I didn’t mean it like that, obviously”

  10. “Don’t be so sensitive”

  11. “You’re so dramatic”

  12. “Calm down”

  13. “You sound crazy”

  14. “You’re remembering this all wrong”

  15. “I was just joking”

  16. “It’s your fault”

  17. “It’s not a big deal”

  18. “I didn’t say that”

  19. “That didn’t happen”

  20. “Stop feeling sorry for yourself”

  21. “Why are you even here if you think I’m so terrible, then?”

  22. “You’re the one who is lying”

  23. “I never did that”


If you are experiencing anything discussed in the blog, you might want to consider one of my online and on demand programmes encouraging a self-taught introduction into building confidence and self-esteem, rewiring limiting belief systems, setting goals and setting intentional action or reducing stress and anxiety. For more information please visit https://www.jessicasadams.com/ondemand




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